If and when.

September 09, 2011

When trust in my job is shaken

and an expensive root canal is a must

and then a crown has to follow

and the tenant's air conditioner breaks

and the dog gets sick three weeks in a row

and the house falls away

and money has to go here

and there

and everywhere except back into the bank account

and the bank account dries up

and the to do list outweighs the hours in the day

and I can't catch a break

and the tears come unexpectedly

and they come more often

and doubt creeps into

my security

my marriage

my job

my plan

His plan

and the first eight months of the year have just been really hard

I settle into the fact that He knows what He is doing

and He is over it all

and He is on my side

and He is bigger than anything that could possibly come my way

because He is the Master of the earth

the Creator of my being

the Planner of my life

the Calmer of storms

and the Fighter of my battles

and at the sound of His name

He is there

always there

day and night

dark and light

so I stop

I just stop

stop overthinking

stop worrying

stop trying to control it all

and I just breathe

and trust

and rest in the very moment He has given me.



"The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still."
{Exodus 14:14}



And if the feelings of doubt, insecurity and worry creep back in

I take a deep breath

and reclaim my own mind

my own self

and settle back into Him.


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